songerein | closed 🌠 all of the stars in the universe...

Entry tags:

closed 🌠 all of the stars in the universe...

Who: Tifa Lockhart and Eustace.
Which: Closed.
Where: Their treehouse.
What: Tifa returns to Reverein after having gone back home for a few days.
Warnings: Lots of FFVII Rebirth spoilers (up to the end of Chapter 13 specifically), and cute Eustifa fluff.

[It had been a long journey to get there. From Kalm, to Corel, to Cosmo Canyon, to Nibelheim, and then the Temple of the Ancients, where it felt like everything they had been fighting for was finally coming to a head. Everything she had been fighting for. They were nearly there, but even with that sense of urgency, there had been worry, too. She could see with her own eyes how badly Cloud had begun to fall, his mind more fractured than it had ever been... A small part of her was too afraid to keep going, afraid of what they might find on the other side, but she pressed on anyway. It was for the greater good—stopping Sephiroth was their number one priority and stopping him would also mean saving Cloud.

Of course, the Cetra had other plans for them.

Before allowing them to continue, they would each be put through a trial. One that would test their will to keep going. One that would force them to revisit their most painful memories... One that would make them re-experience loss...

For Tifa, it was that of her home. Her father. Her village. And that innocence that burned away with it. The night that would change her and her life in the most drastic ways.

All of that anger she thought that she could forget and let go of... be free of... had come crawling back into her the moment she found him lying on the metal grate floor and the stench of mako burned her lungs.]

Monsters.

Sephiroth... SOLDIERs... Mako... Shinra...

I'm sick of this.

I'm sick of all of this!

[She doesn't know what she's expecting when she walks through the door, shaking hands balled into fists at her side. Visions of that night overlap with what she sees, and she can almost feel the cold metal of Sephiroth's sword between her fingertips, as if she were back there on that night five years ago...

...

But it certainly is not to be sprung upward through a dark tunnel and be spat out onto a grassy field beneath a rain of glitter, the entire situation so strange and at odds with how she's feeling, tears of anger burning as they form in her eyes. They blur her vision for a moment, and she has to blink them away for the familiarity to sink in. It's jarring as hell, but almost immediate, as more memories come flooding back.

With the very last thing she remembers being his voice telling her that it will be okay, and that whatever happens, she is his wife. The life here is their own. Then he kissed her.

And that was that.

She scrambles to her feet, ignoring the way that glitter falls from her, and she is understandably wary as she stares at the meadow and trees surrounding her. She knows this place and knows it well, but... there's that nagging question in the back of her mind as her feet are suddenly carrying her in the only direction she knows right now, running as fast as she can move.

Please don't let this be a part of it... Please. Please...

Please let this be real.

Everything looks as real as she remembers it, but that was the point, wasn't it? Nibelheim was just as she remembered it, the reactor was just as she remembered it...

Please let him be there... and alive... that this isn't some nightmare that she is going to be forced to relive.

The tree is as covered in flowers as it has ever been, and though she spots some differences, like the front walkway being cleared of petals, she doesn't pay much mind to any of it as she rushes up the stairs and goes crashing through the door, nearly out of breath.]

Eustace!?

[A look around tells her that the house is empty, and there's a strong, thick feeling of dread that sinks into the pit of her stomach. No, he's just not home, that's all. He had to step out, that's all. This is real. This isn't part of what she just had to go through. There's no way, considering that, up until the moment she was thrown up from the well, she couldn't remember this place at all. Or him. So how would the Cetra...

Her heart nearly leaps into her throat when she sees the kitchen table decorated with bouquets of flowers and a hand-drawn card...

"Welcome Back!"

...

Her eyes sting once more with the beginnings of tears, and while her heart aches and yearns, she remains cautious. After all, her trial had started off innocent enough, only for it to take a sudden and dark turn.

She picks up the note that's been left, among a small pile of others...

"At the café. Use the journals if you come back."
"Out with the dogs. Will be back soon."

The same one is scribbled on a new piece of paper, and she wants to smile. Her lips even curl into one, but the feeling only makes her more scared than happy to see his writing.

The notes are great and all, but where is he?]

Eustace...?

[She starts to wander to the bedroom now, her steps slow and guarded, and she steels herself for what she could find when she opens the door...

But all that greets her is cold, dark loneliness.

She lets out a sigh, though not one out of relief. More out of confusion than anything... She wishes that she could at least be cautiously optimistic, but...

Walking into the room, Tifa drops herself onto the bed, noting the way that the sheets are covered in more corgi hair than she can remember it ever having, and curls up, hugging his pillow close to her chest, breathing in the scent of his that he's left behind...

...

....

And she starts to cry as fear grips and cradles every part of her, everything giving in to the grief at last.]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[The past few days were...long. This would be the first time Tifa returned to her world, and while he's gone through it before and more aware of how it's supposed to work, that doesn't mean he can't be anxious about it. Nor did he expect that sinking, lonely feeling that immediately dropped in his chest when he watched her disappear. It's different from waving someone off going on a trip.

Much different.

But if she had to deal with him being gone like this before, he did, too, which is why he approved and encouraged her when it felt time. Why he reminded her that he would be here, waiting. That no matter she discovers, this world here is their life. Separate from whatever happens over there.

That doesn't mean he still didn't feel that loneliness, a feeling so stark and strange that hits harder when he returns home and she's not there. And for a brief moment he stands in the living room completely alone, everything...silent except for the echos of her voice, her scent, her laughter. He couldn't even imagine how he was able to live the way he had before meeting how. How he was able to live all by himself without caring or wanting anyone else. He's certain he wouldn't be able to do it again. Not long term, at least.

Fortunately the silence is broken when the dogs rush in from downstairs, greeting and whining at him. He opted to keep them here because they would make such a fuss watching Tifa leave, but he also did feel a bit bad, made worse by the younger ones crying howls. But having their attention and need to be taken care of also helps him—helps him push away that loneliness to focus on those who still need him.

So with some encouraging words and a lot of pets and cuddles, he takes them out and...tries to go about his day.

Whether it's being with Lyria, at the cafe, with the dogs, or even cleaning up and doing the chores that had been put off until now, he just keeps himself moving, occasionally wondering if this was how Tifa felt when he left. Not knowing when she would return, he always prepared fresh flowers and kept the house as clean as he could. Unfortunately...it was the time when the dogs, especially the corgis, started to shed so even when he swept the floor clean, five minute later there would be a small dusting of hair.

He really tried his best.

And at night, they would all jump onto the bed and surround him, ensuring that that space Tifa once filled was never empty.

On the day of Tifa's arrival, he had first gone to the cafe to do the usual work. That morning he left the note he always left, just in case Tifa were to arrive. He didn't want her fretting about where he is, and it would at least give her a hint should she want to try to find him. But when he returned that late afternoon to find nothing had changed, he could only be a little more disappointed until he took out the dogs for a walk. It had been a few days now... Surely she should return soon?

Upon returning home, he and all the dogs look towards the house, wondering...hoping...and bracing for another day of disappointment. But it would be Briallen who catches Tifa's familiar scent, and with a sharp bark she tugs on the leash. Hearing it, the others dogs start barking in a frenzy, and immediately that hope jumps and catches in his throat as his heart pounds.

Could it be? Could she really have returned...?

The sound of the dogs barking and the thundering of paws and boots echo as they race up the stairs and burst through the door, the dogs already rushing through as Eustace can't help but call out—]

Tifa!?

[She hears the sound of the dogs first, and for a moment, it's distinctly faraway, like an old, cherished memory that she's spent so much time and effort not to forget. She can hear their paws rushing up the stairs and through the door, but it's his voice that has Tifa lifting her head from the pillow, the fabric soaked through with tears still spilling from red, puffy eyes.]

Eustace...?

[Her voice is choked, and he probably couldn't even hear her, but she tries to call to him anyway as she shoves herself up off the bed, staggers and trips on her way to the door, and rushes out of the bedroom. It's there that she freezes, her eyes landing on him the moment she sees him like she is seeing a ghost, and her heart twists violently in her chest.

Is this even real?]

[Not seeing her in the kitchen or living room, they all rush towards the bedroom. But before they can reach it, Tifa appears and—

At first it seems all time stands still. She was only gone for a few days, and yet if felt so much longer. And even though the dogs immediately rush at her, Eustace stands there for a moment before he realizes she had been clearly crying. It's enough to snap him out of his brief stupor before he's rushing over, almost tripping over the dogs as his hands reach out to her.]

I'm still here.

[Although her thoughts are a bit different, he knows that feeling. That skepticism, that doubt, that fear that what she sees is just a dream and she'll wake up and not be here. Fear that maybe he's not here at all. So he is going to be quick to try and pull her to his arms so she can not only hear and see him, but feel him as well.]

[She can feel the dogs at her ankles, hear them whining and barking as they surround her, but Tifa's eyes remain locked onto him, the fear only growing the longer that silence spreads. She blinks, and then he's right there, pulling her into his arms in the way that he always does, and she feels like she might break with how tight he holds her, his heartbeat singing in her ears as she wraps her arms around him in return.

Even if this is a trick, she wants it to be true badly enough that she is willing to lean into it for just a moment, and those tears and the cries that she had tried to hold back come pouring out of her, this mix of fear and relief and grief more overwhelming than anything she's felt in a long, long time.

He's still here, he says, and she wants to believe him. She clings to him like he will fade into smoke if she lets go, and when she finally pulls back after allowing herself a selfish moment to just cry in his arms, her eyes are swimming with panic.

And she half expects that if he doesn't disappear, he will transform into that nightmarish thing again instead.]

This is it?

[Her broken voice trembles.]

You're real, aren't you? All of you are?

[He didn't think she'd cry again after seeing him. In fact, while he had a feeling she'd be emotional, he expected something more...excited? Happy? Anything but this, and now he can't help but worry what she went through to have her be like this. Or was him not being here that terrifying for her?

Even when she pulls back, he continues to hold her close, his hand rubbing her back like he always does when he needs to soothe her, and his forehead now tipping closer to rest against hers.]

Yes, I am—we all are. It's only been a few days since you left...

[He pulls back just a little so he can look at her carefully.]

...Let's sit down.

[She continues to be both wary and clingy, her mind and her body at war with each other as she heads to the couch. Even her footsteps are feather-light, like she's tiptoeing, not wanting to disturb this vision if that's all that it is. The dogs even sense that something is wrong, and she can feel them brushing up against her legs even as she collapses on the couch. But all her mind can focus on is the feel of his hand on her back.

All the while, her puffy, swollen eyes scan Eustace still, and the dogs.]

... I remember.

[She can confirm that much, at least... that she knows what happened. She remembers that she said she'd be back in a few days at most, and here she is...]

It's been... at least a couple weeks for me.

[The whole time his eyes never leave her, and once sitting he keeps his arm around her, the other going to her hand.]

What happened?

[Her fingers immediately curl around his hand when he takes it, and she doesn't mean to hold on so tight... perhaps too tight. Nor does she realize it.]

Where to even start...

[Maybe at the part where she's afraid of what this all actually is. So, after a moment, she continues.]

... I'm scared. I don't know what's real and what's not anymore, Eustace.

[He tightens his hold on her hand at that, eyes narrowing in worry.]

What do you mean?

[She hangs her head, unable to look at him as she says it.]

Part of me... isn't sure if you're real. Or if this is all part of that trial.

[Should she even be saying this? She had been hesitant to in case it did shatter this image that's built around her, which is why she speaks slowly.

When Melody comes up and rests her chin on Tifa's knees, she can't help but smile a little sadly.]

Like all of this is just going to go up in smoke, or worse...

[Then it's a good thing that right now she'll only feel the solid warmth of his body.]

What do you mean by trial?

[Just like she could feel the cold of her father's body against her fingertips, or the heat of the fire as it burned through Nibelheim...]

It's a long story...

[Maybe not one to tell when she is reeling from it—and this—still... but she at least owes him this much for sitting here wondering if this is true or not.]

We're searching for something. The Black Materia... and I think we've found it. Or we're close.

[All of her words are broken up and jumbled, and she can feel tears about to erupt in her eyes again.]

We each had to go through some sort of trial to keep going... I don't know why, but... I saw my village burning. I saw my dad at the reactor, dead. And when I walked through the door again, I was here.

[He listens carefully, watches her carefully, before his eyes widen.]

So that's why you're not sure... Because you're afraid this may be part of that trial.

[Her eyes look around their home first, at the dogs who are all huddled hopefully around them, their big eyes staring up at her with worry, and then... to him, and it's then that her breath catches as she fights a violent sob.]

Yeah.

[Nailed it in one.]

... When I came up the front steps, I was scared that I would find you... like that again.

[He reaches up to brush his hand against her cheek, pushing back her hair as he press his palm against her.]

Like what?

[He has an idea, but he wants to hear it to be sure.]

[...

Her hands shake, her eyes searching his face, and she almost doesn't want to say it and breathe life into that horrible memory again. And if this is all part of the trial, then she doesn't want to give this vision or hallucination or whatever this is the idea that it's possible...

So before she can answer...

She lunges forward and wraps her arms around him, bringing them both into a tight, unmoving embrace. Perhaps in part to make sure that he doesn't, the other being that she is still absolutely terrified that it might just happen.]

Noctaere.

[The single word comes out of her with a strained voice in his ear.]

[He's first surprised by the sudden embrace, his arms immediately and naturally going around her. But hearing that word against his ear, he stiffens, head turning slightly to look at her.

And then he's closing his eyes and sitting back, pulling her along with him so that she's more on top of him as he only hugs her tighter.]

I'm all right.

[He then reaches for one of her hands to bring it back to his face, eyes focused on hers.]

You can feel it now, can't you?

[He tilts his face so that his lips can brush against her palm, to let her feel that familiar heat and touch of his love, teasing her a little.]

Whatever trial you were in... It's over. And more importantly...

[It's her lips that he'll take next, soft and warm and tender as always as his voice lowers to a quiet murmur.]

You're home.

[When he pulls her to him, the dogs hop up to take the spot where she once was, but every bit of Tifa's focus is on Eustace, her arms around his shoulders and anchoring her to him, not just physically, but in every other way. Like he is her anchor to this place, this life that is trickling back into her thoughts and memories. The life that he had called their own.

Her eyes quiver and widen when she feels the warmth of his face, the touch of his lips on her hand, and the rush of love that she feels is so overwhelming, so overpowering that she dreads the thought of losing it. Dreads the thought of losing him, and having to watch him disappear right before her very eyes, along with the dogs.

This home.

This life.

But when he kisses her and utters those words, it's enough to chase those fears away for now, and when they part, her eyes flutter open once more to meet his, more sure of herself even through the tears that fall over her cheeks.]

... I'm home.

[She repeats the sentiment before breaking again beneath the weight of those words, and her body completely crashes over his when she falls to him.]

I was so scared...

[His eyes close as he continues to hold her close, trying to give her anything that would help her. Help reassure her that yes, she's here. She's with him. She's home.]

I'm sorry... If we had returned sooner...

[She shakes her head, burying her face into his neck.]

No. It probably wouldn't have changed anything.

[She still would have broken down in tears just like she is now. Still would have been afraid, and...]

... I'm sorry that I doubted you.

[A hard shake of his head as he presses his lips against the top of her head.]

Don't. It's only reasonable after what you went through.

[What she went through... this doesn't even begin to graze the tip of the iceberg, but now is not the time. She's just relieved to be back with him and their family, and that those fears are slowly fading, all thanks to him.]

Is this what it was like...? When it happened to you?

[Her arms tighten around him, but she does lift her head to look at the dogs beside them, their worried little faces staring back at her, and Tifa can't help but smile at them through her tears.]

That feeling of disorientation? A bit.

[He thinks back on both those times...]

It was only the first time that I felt the kind of fear you did... Afraid that you were gone or worse, especially when I found the tree as it had been.

[That time he left without warning and right after she had moved in...]

[She remembers that time well. How cold and dark and lonely the tree had been, and she had still been in the process of moving her things over. Those few days that he had been gone were some of the most difficult days she spent here...]

Guess it didn't take very long for that to go away, did it...

No.

[A light nuzzle against her cheek.]

Because you were there... That was all I need.

[A soft kiss.]

...Although I did have that fear I would wake yo and everything would be gone for a few days. But that also went away.

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject

no subject