songerein | log 🌻 the one left behind

Entry tags:

log 🌻 the one left behind

Who: Zelda and others
Which: Log with open and closed prompts in the comments
Where: Around Reverein- Wild Harvest, Archives, and Wishing Well
What: Zelda wakes from her sleep coma and is big sad about her bf being gone
Warnings: Usual TOTK spoilers, possible themes of self-sacrifice

[ Zelda wakes slowly, opening her eyes to sunlight filtering through the window, playing on the rafters crisscrossing above her head and illuminating a few dust motes drifting in the air. The ceiling of her bedroom in Songerein.

She lets out a slow, defeated sigh and closes her eyes again.

She failed again.

The day Zelda woke to discover Link gone, she laid down in her bed and willed herself to go back to sleep. His departure did not come as a surprise, but that did not make it any easier to bear. He had told her that he would soon return to Hyrule, as if he knew-- no, not just knew, decided to go, as if that conviction was all he needed to break free from the shackles the dream world placed on its residents. It was time for him to return, he said. He was going to bring her home too. Nevermind the permanence of the draconification transformation. Nevermind the obstacle of the Demon King, looming insurmountable over Hyrule. He was going to overcome it all.

He was going to bring her home.

If Link could escape Songerein simply through sleep and conviction, then surely Zelda could as well. Why stay, when staying meant being without him? She only agreed to set duty aside and live for as long as the two of them were together. Link was gone; time for Zelda to fulfill her duty and become the Light Dragon.

And she partially succeeded; the princess managed to slip into a sleep coma of her own volition, where she spent the entirety of a month. But of course, escape still eluded her. Three times, Zelda has tried to wake of her own volition. Once by trying to swallow her secret stone and force the draconification transformation. Once by throwing enough baubles into the wishing well to grant her passage back to Hyrule. And now, by forcing herself to sleep. All three times, Zelda has failed.

Really, she should not be surprised. Leave it to Link to succeed in something like this the moment he puts his mind to it, and for Zelda to struggle and fail repeatedly. Such has always been the way for the two of them, hasn't it?

Zelda continues to lay in bed for awhile, wondering if she should try again, until the bedsores all over her body become too much for her to bear. No, she needs to get up. She needs to do something. If she doesn't find some way to occupy her mind, her thoughts will drift to Link... and whenever they do, it feels like scalding knives driving into her chest.

The pain of being the one left behind. ]

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[ Given how busy Zelda is making herself, and how much she has in her arms, it's likely she isn't able to see that floor. Normally given how tidy the place can be, this wouldn't be an issue...

Except today, a visitor who is small enough to fit in the palm of your hand is on the floor. And there's a definite yelp as she dives out of the way! ]

Th-that was too close!

[ The archives are usually in much better order than they are right now. Trahearne would have never allowed them to get this messy! So with her arms full and attention everywhere but the floor in front of her, Zelda has no idea Black Raisin Cookie is there until she hears a little yelp from almost right beneath her. Zelda starts, crying out in surprise and jumping to the side (fortunately, the opposite side from where BRC dove). A few papers slide off the top of her pile. ]

I am so sorry! Please forgive me, I did not see you... [ The princess looks around frantically for the source of the person she apparently almost bumped into? But she doesn't see anyone?? ] ...there.

[ A heavy sigh follows... one that comes from below. ]

Yes, people rarely do in this place. Raisin Crows, assist her at once.

[ "Caw, caw, caw!"

Her papers are being picked up, one by one, by... little birdies. And we do mean little - they're only a little bigger than gumballs! Five Raisin Crows in total, all of them working together to pick up the papers and gently place them back atop her pile. ]

[ BRC calls them 'crows,' but from Zelda's perspective, they look rather more like large flies. Until they fly up with her papers, that is, and she can get a decent look at them. No, they're not flies, they literally flying raisins. She can't keep awe from showing on her face as they steadily deposit each of her lost papers back on the pile. ]

Thank you... [ There's clear wonder along with the sincerity of her thanks. Zelda has lived in Songerein for a long time and seen many, many unusual things, but miniature crows made of raisins are a first. ]

My apologies for nearly stepping on you. [ Her eyes follow the crows as they return to BRC, leading Zelda to the person she almost stepped on.

...Said person is a cookie woman.

Do not ask, Zelda. You are a princess. It would be the height of rudeness to ask a question you can plainly see the answer to with your own two eyes. She is a cookie woman and that's just the way of it. Do not stare. ]

Are you new to the archives? I do not believe I have seen you here before.

[ Which would be easy to do, given, you know, cookie. ]

[ She's used to the stare - but she is surprised the ARE YOU REALLY A COOKIE?! question doesn't follow. It's usually the first thing out of people's mouths. Kudos to Zelda. ]

Yes, this is my first time in this place. I'm trying to learn more about this world, in order to better master Dreamotion.

[ She heads to one bookshelf, and then begins hopping - hup, hup, hup - upwards, the crows following. ]

[ Instead of being dumbfounded, Zelda ought to be thanking BRC for her whole cookie-ness; the surprise of meeting a living cookie person has momentarily knocked her right out of her moody funk.

The princess watches BRC as she hops up the bookshelf, impressed by her dexterity. (She also makes a mental note to discuss some possible accessibility improvements to the archives to accommodate smaller patrons.) ]

Well, you have come to the right place. The Songerein Wikki Archives are our repository of knowledge and documentation on this world. All of the materials in this place have been collected and authored by dreamwalkers past and present.

So I have heard. In my world, only certain Cookies can use magic, blessed in their very dough. So to have it available to everyone here, it's still something hard to believe... and so I've been having trouble using it myself. My goal is to use Dreamotion to change my height.

[ For... obvious reasons.

She walks along one bookshelf, trying to find one she can use, but most of them are bigger than she is, no surprise. ]

[ That's interesting. Technicalities aside, that's not too dissimilar to how magic works in Hyrule. Most folk cannot using magic in any form and those who can either inherited their power through their lineage or trained without rest to hone it. ]

An understandable goal. Most folk here that are of your same stature are capable of some form of flight.

[ Zelda scans the titles of the books on the same shelf as BRC. If any of them appear to interest her, the princess intends to grab it for her. ]

What sort of information do you feel would be most helpful to you? Perhaps I can assist you in finding it.

[ She shakes her head. ]

You're clearly already busy enough as is. You can go ahead and resume your work. My Raisin Crows and I will find what we need on our own.

Please.

[ Zelda deposits her stack of papers on a nearby table. Either she'll come back for them later or one of the other librarians will find them. ]

You would actually be helping me as well. You see, I have recently taken over operation of this place, but I have only ever used it as a researcher until now. It would be beneficial for me to learn how to assist other researchers.

... Very well. So long as it would assist us both.

[ In that case, she may as well introduce herself. ]

I am Black Raisin Cookie, and these are my Raisin Crows.

[ "Caw, caw, caw!" say the crows, all of them hovering around their mistress. ]

[ Zelda carefully resists the urge to ask if "Cookie" is a surname, title, or something else entirely. ]

I am Princess Zelda of Hyrule. [ She politely inclines her head. ] And administrator of these archives, I suppose. A pleasure to make your acquaintance.

[ Nope, that's just 'everyone'. In fact, it's been difficult not to call everyone Cookie - Alastor Cookie, Helga Cookie, Zelda Cookie, etc...

But at the title, BRC seems startled! ]

Ah...! My apologies if I overstepped in any way, your highness.

[ Oh! It's been awhile since anyone reacted with such surprise and formality to Zelda's title. Goodness, she has become so spoiled to the casual way most dreamwalkers treat her. ]

Nothing of the sort. [ She politely waves off BRC's concern. ] And you needn't be so formal with me. My title is of little consequence in this world.

... I wouldn't say it's of little consequences. It's part of who you are, how you were raised, and a part of your world. I won't use the title if you wish it, but royalty is deserving of respect, no matter the place.

[ A matter she takes quite seriously, given how her BFF is kinda-sorta-king-ish. Anyway, she hops onto another shelf, and after inspecting a book's spine, lightly taps on it. All five crows flutter to the book and begin to tug, trying to pull it out. ]

[ Well. That's also an unexpected reaction. And Zelda looks openly taken aback to hear it.

But BRC makes good points and Zelda nods in acknowledgement. She's had a complicated relationship with her royal title in the past. Sometimes she hated it, because it represented the duty she couldn't perform. Other times, she felt unworthy of for those same reasons, and the people of Hyrule criticized her as a failure. She hid it, once upon a time when she first arrived in Songerein. It was a burden she longed to be free of.

But she could never fully hate it, because she could never fully hate her kingdom. The reason her failures to awaken her sacred power hurt so terribly was because she truly wanted to save Hyrule from prophesied destruction. She loved her homeland-- and still loves it to this day, so much so that she'll give up everything she is to ensure its salvation. ]

Thank you. I suppose I had not thought about it like that. [ Zelda reaches for where the crows are struggling and pulls out the book, careful not to accidentally hit any of them. ] In general, I do prefer folk here not pay me undue reverence, as I am not this land's sovereign. 'Princess' is sufficient, should you prefer it, but I've grown quite comfortable simply being 'Zelda.'

[ Zelda opens the book to its table of contents and holds it where BRC can easily read it. ] Now, does ought look promising about this text?

[ If BRC noticed the shock she accidentally created within Zelda, she doesn't comment on it - or maybe she didn't, too focused on her own task. Regardless, she stays silent, having to walk back and forth a bit to properly read the page.

Finally, she nods. ]

Yes, this is a good start. Place it down, and I will read. I give you my word we will not disturb you during my studies.

[ After all, she has to study here... she can't very well take it with her, given her size and strength! ]

[ Zelda takes the book to a nearby table and sets it down so that it is still open to the table of contents. ]

I appreciate your consideration, but please do call on me if you require assistance in anything.

[ She holds her hand flat beside the shelf BRC is standing on, an offer to carry her to the table where Zelda placed the book. "Anything" means "anything," regardless of whether it's related to research. Although BRC is clearly capable to getting around on her own in spite of how much larger her surroundings are, surely some help getting around would make things easier. ]

[ An offer that BRC will take. She walks onto the hand, and Zelda will undoubtably notice that she weighs as much as a Cookie, and smells like one too.

you know you wanna ask, Zelda. don't fight it. she's heard it all before. ]

My thanks. I may need to return to these archives again and again, so I can better know how to master Dreamotion.

... I don't suppose, if you've been here for some time, you can give me any advice or tips?

[ BRC definitely feels (and smells) like a cookie... It's honestly rather uncanny and reminds Zelda vividly of the way the kitchen staff at the castle would bake armies of cookie people and animals during the midwinter holidays.

...That feels like a rather insensitive thing to bring up, especially on a first meeting, so Zelda will carefully suppress that memory for now.

Besides, she's actually more amused by being asked for advice on dreamotion. Imagine, Zelda, who could count on one hand the times she successfully used dreamotion during her first year in Songerein, being asked for assistance with dreamotion. ]

I have been here for several years, yes. [ Zelda lowers her hand to the table so BRC can hop off. ] Perhaps you could tell me what you've tried so far. Dreamotion is... finicky, and differs from person to person.

[ Oof she hops! And all the Raisin Crows flutter around BRC, with one sitting on her shoulder. The birbs be chillin'. ]

I've only tried to use Dreamotion in two ways. The first was for food and drink... while I can eat what's here, I didn't want to take away anything essential from someone else. So I've been content to make myself jellies and soda water.

[ ... Because. that's normal for Cookies??? ]

The second is my height... which, I've said, I've been struggling with. Even a few inches would be a great boon.

[ (Why... why does a cookie need to eat and drink? Eating aside, wouldn't additional liquid just make a cookie soggy??) ]

And have you experienced any successes in your efforts?

[ It sounds like BRC has been managing to create food just fine, but unless she started out as a significantly smaller cookie, she probably hasn't had much luck increasing her height. ]

[ Wait until Zelda learns Cookies bleed. And there are Cookies smaller than her!

A heavy sigh follows.]

As you can see, it hasn't been working. I can't tell if it's because the magic of this place is so difficult to master... or if it's... somehow my fault. Something holding me back.

[ Sad little caws from the birbs. No, mistress, it's not your fault! ]

[ Do not tell her that cookies bleed she will not be able to handle that. ]

Know that I mean this as kindly as possible, but when it comes to dreamotion, the problem is likely a bit of both.

[ Zelda pauses for a moment as she thinks how to explain. No matter how she says it, it's going to come off kind of harsh. ]

Dreamotion hinges on 'intent,' essentially, and part of intent is the conviction that you will succeed. Dreamotion relies on positive emotions and confidence in those emotions. If you are plagued by doubt, even subconsciously, your dreamotion will not manifest as you want it to. [ She regards BRC sympathetically. ] This exact problem plagued me for my first two years here.

[ First two years?! Yikes! BRC staggers a bit, almost saying something, but forces herself not to. She closes her eyes, and releases another heavy sigh. ]

Then... that would explain everything. Doubt has been plaguing me ever since I first stepped first in this place. Being among all these giants, constantly being told I could be their food source, powerless against the dangers here...even when I'm at my most confident, I still feel those chains weighing me down.

... Perhaps in the end, this was a fool's errand.

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log 🌻 the one left behind

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